Zoo Review (The Novel)

Total
For 36 years, James Patterson has written unputdownable, pulse-racing novels. Now, he has written a book that surpasses all of them. ZOO is the thriller he was born to write.

World
All over the world, brutal attacks are crippling entire cities. Jackson Oz, a young biologist, watches the escalating events with an increasing sense of dread. When he witnesses a coordinated lion ambush in Africa, the enormity of the violence to come becomes terrifyingly clear.

Destruction
With the help of ecologist Chloe Tousignant, Oz races to warn world leaders before it’s too late. The attacks are growing in ferocity, cunning, and planning, and soon there will be no place left for humans to hide. –

With wildly inventive imagination and white-knuckle suspense that rivals Stephen King at his very best, James Patterson’s ZOO is an epic, non-stop thrill-ride from “One of the best of the best.” (TIME) – Goodreads Synopsis

–S&S–

Zoo Review

When it comes to the blurbs on this book, it makes it out to be this breath-taking novel full of sweeping awesomeness. It’s not. Zoo is mediocre at the best of times, and eye-rolling ridiculousness at worst. The people on the Lets-Love-Everything-Patterson-Produces train need to throw themselves off of it before it crashes. I fully admit Patterson is a talented writer (or at least used to be), but this… this is not a good book. This is, in fact, a quite crappy book. I might even go so far as to call it a ridiculous piece of drivel.

Yeah, I had issues with this book. It sucked. Unless it was sneakily written as a parody. Now, as a parody, it still wouldn’t have been great, but it’d have got a higher rating than what it’s going to get from me.

Absolute ridiculousness emphasis on Oz’s masculinity, completely stupid decisions on the part of a supposed ‘scientist’ just to start with. Choppily written chapters and a laughably unbelievable scientific explanation for the cause of the problem. Did these two authors sit down one night, bemoaning the lack of a good ‘bad syfy’ movie on cable, and think “Hey! I bet we can write one?” I could see it happening this way, and then the book being pounded out between bottles of beer. When it came time to write the reason for everything, one slurs “Wik*hic*Wikipedia, man… Ev’r’one knows it’s troof!” and wa-la! The next morning, the book was written, but they were too hungover to address the bad writing, but sent it out and… because it’s Patterson, everyone instantly was like “Oh, my god! The greatness! The awesomeness!”

Okay, ouch, even I admit that might have been a little harsh. But still. I expected better from a book that had such an awesome idea at the root of it! This could have been an absolutely terrifying novel that made us side-eye all our animals. Instead Zoo was a laughably inept piece of fiction that should never have made it past the editors, let alone into the hands of the general populace.

Why is it even getting a two of five from me? Because I like the straight-forward acknowledgement that people are idiots at the end. Don’t believe me? Buy it (on Amazon), and see for yourself.

Title: Zoo | Authors: James Patterson and Michael Ledwidge | Publisher: Grand Central Publishing | Pub. Date: 2012-9-3 | Pages: 390 | ISBN13: 9781455591237 | Genres: Science Fiction & Thriller | Language: English | Triggers: None | Rating: 2 out of 5 | Date Read: 2016-6-23 | Source: Library