Yes, we’re on a horror movie kick. Isn’t it awesome? This Flyby Five we’re going to look at our favorite animal horror movies. And we’re not talking Cujo. We’re talking the really bad animal horror movies like… well, you’ll just have to find out.
Flyby Five, where we abandon all sense of seriousness and do silly lists about whatever pops into our heads. This segment will be posted every Wednesday we feel like posting it. This is not a serious list, nor is it a “Top 5” list. And there is every possible chance that some of these lists or the language in these lists may not be PG-13 friendly. You have been warned. -L&G
5 Phobia-Triggering Animal Movies We Love
Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead (2006): Directed by Lloyd Kauffman, and starring Jason Yachanin, Kate Graham, and Allyson Sereboff. Poultrygeist is one of two horror movies that have ever managed to make me gag. I’m one of those people that can eat rice while watching a character spit maggots out, so it takes a fair bit to disturb me. With that being said, it’s also a hilarious movie, and your horror movie education isn’t complete until you’ve watched it. Just…do so on an empty stomach if you’re prone to queasiness.
Poultrygeist Synopsis: Zombified chickens attempt to kill the fast-food workers that cook them in a restaurant built on an ancient burial ground.
IMDB Rating: 6.2
Alektorophobia: Fear of Chickens.
Black Sheep (2006): I guess 2006 was a good year for atrocious animal horror movies. Black Sheep was a b-a-a-a-a-d good movie. I couldn’t help but giggle and ‘ewe’ my way through it. It was directed by Jonathan King and starred Oliver Driver, Nathan Meister, and Tammy Davis.
Black Sheep Synopsis: An experiment in genetic engineering turns harmless sheep into bloodthirsty killers that terrorize a sprawling New Zealand farm.
IMDB Rating: 5.8
Ovinophobia: Fear of sheep.
Snakes on a Plane (2006): See? 2006 strikes again! Who hasn’t watched Snakes on a Plane? If snakes make your skin slither (sorry), then this is not the movie for you. There’s scenes in there that will make even someone who rather likes the scaly boogers cringe. (Like the snake in the toilet. Yeeeeeouch!)
Snakes on a Plane Synopsis: An FBI agent takes on a plane full of deadly and venomous snakes, deliberately released to kill a witness being flown from Honolulu to Los Angeles to testify against a mob boss.
IMDB Rating: 5.6
Ophidiophobia: Fear of snakes.
Big Ass Spider (2013): Okay, I admit, the cringe moments are fairly few in this one, but they are good ones. (Like the spider coming out of the corpse bag. Gaahhhh. Or the old lady coming on to the pest control guy.) This movie is extremely re-watchable, and actually shot very nicely. And when you freak out over a spider the size of a penny, could you imagine seeing one of these buggers coming at you? No thanks.
Big Ass Spider Synopsis: A giant alien spider escapes from a military lab and rampage the city of Los Angeles. When a massive military strike fails, it is up to a team of scientists and one clever exterminator to kill the creature before the city is destroyed.
IMDB Rating: 5.3
Arachnophobia: Fear of Spiders
Frankenfish (2004): This is probably the worst one of the lot, literally. Though it still has it’s good moments, otherwise it wouldn’t be on this list of animal horror movies. When I finally saw the Frankenfish, I actually cheered for it. It looked ridiculous, but isn’t that when they’re at their best?
Frankenfish Synopsis: When the body of a man is found completely destroyed in the swamps in Louisiana, the medical investigator Sam Rivers is assigned to investigate the murder.
IMDB Rating: 4.8
Ichthyophobia: Fear of fish
Do you have an animal-based phobia? Is it bad enough you can’t bring yourself to watch movies involving them?